5th of July Hero Day
Remember that time your tent melted?
I was having a hard time recently- felt like a piece of meat to be consumed., to be ripped apart and divided amongst the wolves. Sometimes I didn’t feel like a person, that I wasn’t even alive. To fix this I needed to find a mirror in nature. I needed to realize that I do not find myself in others, but in the life that surrounds me and that we all share together.
It confirms my life without the rules, without the walls, without the words and all the violence that is necessarily attached to those constructs. This connection reaffirms my unspoken connection to the world and allows me the experience of being a creature in the world. I’ve heard so often, concerning sex and gender, that this is “just the way things are” and my retort is that there is no “way things are” Life moves in all directions at all speeds and our suffering, pain fears come from believing that there is one expected way. To believe that life simply exists, without a way that humans influence and understand changes the entire perspective.
Flip is jumping out of the first plane he’s ever been in. “I’m just gonna be a leaf in the wind, man.”
“It’s a beautiful day to jump out of a plane.” GooRoo
I sang my Captain Planet theme song as I fell through the sky. Bill, John Solo, Sweet Pea, Gooroo and I did a tandem jump from 10,000+ (15000?) feet.
I remember watching my instructors elevation meter as we passed 6,000ft, as we went higher than the highest mountains on trail. I got so excited when we were higher than anything on the AT that I started telling my instructor about Clingman’s Dome in the Smoky Mountains. As we got higher I felt more butterflies. There was an intensity in the car ride over than was in full bloom now. We were so pensive in the car and now I was so excited looking out the plane window. I was happy that Bill was jumping with us!
When it came to be my turn to jump I felt his sensation from my body. I looked out into the sky and my mind said “NO.”
“YOU’LL FALL. YOU CAN’T FLY IN THAT.”
And I knew everything would be fine because that’s how I learned to swim. 1,2,3 and there was no going back. There was no sense of dropping like you get on a roller coaster because the wind resistance was so high. I felt stable. I felt like I was flying, not falling.I felt like a superhero with an imaginary cape. I looked out at the horizon. I looked around for the trail and mountains, but we were too far away. I watched as my shadow reflected a rainbow in the semi-transparent clouds we were falling through. All I could do was witness and accept. I felt a tap from my instructor and pulled the ball to release the parachute. In that moment we were jerked to a halt. I sat heavy in the harness and watched as Gooroo spiraled away below me doing tricks. I laughed seeing him below.
After we landed we watched as Chezwick, Flip and Duster fell down out of the sky. I have such a special connection to these hikers and to this day. Thanks for the Hero Day guys! Thank you Bill!